I think I'm beginning to expect less. & it ain't a good thing.

I cried last night because of a friend. Then I went to sleep and received something in my mail box today. But I don't feel anything in particular. Wasn't very happy or excited. I don't know how to handle things anymore. It's so tiring to always have to feel the way I do. Heart feels really heavy now. 

& I have to pretend everything is okay otherwise it will affect my momentum to do work.